What it is all about

I swam 1k last night at the indoor pool.....the annoying part is that in a 25m pool that's 40 laps.

 Anyway while I was there I noticed a father and his daughter arriving to swim together, she was about 15 and he was about 40. Firstly I think its great that they were there doing something active together, and I really hope that is me and my children one day. 

The point here is that the father was very overweight. For me this was like a glimpse into what my future may have been had I not discovered my desire to run. I looked at this poor man with pity as he struggled with the walk between the seats and the pool, and I realised what my exercise regime is really about.

The way that we see ourselves is unlikely to motivate us to change our ways for the better. However once you have kids, all you need to do is imagine the way your kids see you and this is a much more powerful motivator.

I grew up with a father who was lean and fit from working in an active job. I don't remember him ever exercising as such but he had hardly an ounce of fat on him. When I think about what my kids see, its a father who is overweight because his job is to sit behind a keyboard all day. The physical aspects of my job involve walking to the cafe, and raising the coffee mug to my mouth.

Since running has entered (perhaps dominated) my life my kids see a daddy who runs real fast, who is active and committed. By the time they get to 15 I hope they see a daddy who is lean and fit, and works hard to lead an active lifestyle. Not one who (as I used to do) needs to have a lie down after mowing the lawns.

My son said the other day while playing with a car "Dadda this car is really fast, its almost as fast as you when you go out for a run" This is the kind of daddy I want my kids to see. He is starting to get upset when we go to runs and he cant run with me, but I'm not sure he is ready for a 5k just yet. 

The point here is that he wants to run. Something I never did until I turned 32 and this will help to shape the man he will become in the future.

The human body is capable of amazing things but we all need to find the trigger inside us that will drive us to achieve amazing things. In the way my kids see me, I have found my source of motivation.

Mixing it up a little

Yesterday when I woke up, I knew I had a bad case of the CBFs. I started coming up with excuses not to run.
- Its too hot,
- I'm too tired
- I would much rather try and justify the purchase of Call of Duty black ops for PS3 by playing that instead.


This is not the first time I have been struck with this thought process and I'm sure it wont be the last. 


I had decided to run a 21k run for my weekends challenge as the last one I did was Marysville and it didn't go so well. The idea was to try and nail the sub 2 hour 1/2 marathon, on a well shaded, very well graded gravel surface. Then the "don't do it because" thoughts popped into my head and I needed to come up with something new and exciting to do, to kick them in the but.


I had left my bike at the station and needed to pick it up so I decided to run to the station, pick up my bike, go for a swim and come home. Simple and different this should have been enough to get me interested enough to make it easy to get out the door.


However, I got my running kit on, packed my bike cage access card and headed out the door some negative thoughts still lingered for example, what if I ran too far and didn't have anything left for the swim, or what if I got chaffing issues from riding my bike while wet (I didn't take a towel).


I walked out the front. Looked up the hill. Looked down the hill. and started running (up the hill) I decided at that point to try and make the run segment about 5k. to do this I would run around some streets and through the park doing a bit of a loop. I was aiming for about 5min 30sec per k, as I didn't want to go too hard or too soft. One thing became very obvious very quickly...It was hot out there. So trying to stick to the shade as much as I could, I altered my course and made it to the station in 5.4k.


Next I hopped on the bike after some very strange looks from the local kids that frequent my station and decided to try and stretch out the run a little. I also at this stage decided to swing past the outdoor pool in the area and see if that had opened for the year. So I did both. After taking some unnecessary detours around the back streets I found my way to the outdoor pool, this totaled  about 1.9k.


Yet again I found myself under some odd scrutiny from the staff at the pool and some more local teenagers when I wheeled my bike up the stairs took off my top, shoes, socks, heart rate strap etc and got in the pool. I was expecting the pool to be freezing, actually I had hoped it would be cold but alas it was solar heated and luckily not too hot. It was amazing swimming outside on a beautiful summers day. 


Here is where I struck an issue. When I was a kid learning to swim we were forced to swim freestyle. As I have grown up I have become lazy. I would much rather amble along swimming breast stroke with my head out of the water. Anyway I decided to try and swim some of my swim freestyle. I managed 1/2 a lap which is more than I have previously been able to do. I have decided that my issue is having my face covered with water, frightens me. 


I don't like the fact that bringing my face up sideways out of the water with it running across my mouth as gravity takes its toll. So what to do about this. I think the only thing I can do to break down this mental block is to swim more, and force myself to swim freestyle. The advice I have been given is that in a triathlon with an open water swim you will revert to the style of swimming you feel safest with. This came from someone who spent money on stroke correction classes etc. 


So it looks like I have a new goal - swim freestyle. Goggles will probably help with this a little and its something I can keep working on.


Anyway I completed 10 laps of the pool. I was wrapped I had swam 250m after a run and a small bike ride, and it felt like I had some more left in me. on a side note I have found out that the outdoor pool is actually 50m not 25m so I had actually covered 500m not 250m.


So next it was time to put all the gear back on, compression top, hat, helmet, HR strap shoes, socks etc. and on my bike. 


Where I parked my bike there is a drinking fountain and I had decided to have a drink before I headed off. In typical fashion of my local council the drinking fountain didn't actually work and I was left thirsty.


So I started heading for home and worked my way up a hill...at this stage I decided I needed something to drink so I headed to the 7-11 up the road for a powerade. By the time I got there I was really into the riding. It was such a nice day to be out and active and I felt great. I opted for an alternate route home which had some challenging hills, well one in particular.


Along my merry way I went. Before I knew it my watch beeped that I had covered 9k and I knew I would crack 10k before I got home. 


As I approached "the hill" **See below** I pedaled my ass off, I rode up the hill at a good clip and was panting like a black dog in hot sun buy the time I hit the crest. Satisfied, tired and proud of my achievement I arrived home to 2 smiling kids who were ecstatic to see their daddy :)


** A note on hills.
when I started running I dreaded 2 parts of my 5k course that encountered hills. I soon discovered as I extended my distance that, its impossible to run very far without encountering some hills, especially when you are running more than 20k training runs. Now when I start a run I usually have an idea of where I am headed, and I know the hills I will encounter (especially around home) but my attitude towards hills has changed somewhat. there is one hill (referred to as The Hill above) that I have tried very hard not to let beat me. Before I lost weight and got fitter I rode that hill with my son on a bike seat. I had to get off and walk up it. On a 10k run about a year after that I found myself happily running up the same hill. The only time I let that hill beat me to a walk since was when I hit it at the end of a 30k training run. I felt bad about that so I decided that no matter what kind of pain I'm experiencing, that hill will not get the better of me again.

Weight, diet and body image

After years and years of being overweight i made a decision. I gave up trying to diet.

I have tried weight watchers, Jenny Craig, going it alone.....all of these things worked in varying degrees of success but never long term, and never to the degree I was looking for.

So I gave up diets, and set a brand spanking new goal....to run.

There had always been some appeal to the thought of coming home from a shit day at work and running out my frustrations. Hey that's what they do in the movies, and whenever you see someone running it almost always looks so easy. Catalyst to this descision was an incident where I was at a park about 500m from home and it started to rain, I ran home to get out raincoats and was basically written off for the rest of the day, sore, tired and struggling to breathe.

What I didn't understand when I started the first steps of this amazing journey was what it meant to run. The definition of a runner is someone who runs...right?

What I do understand now is that i was caught in a viscous cycle of bad choices, and half-hearted justifications. I did no exercise because I was too tired. I was too tired because I did no exercise. I ate too much and junk because "Im sure it doesn't make that much of a difference" and "I'm too tired to make the effort" and round and round we go.

So how do we break the cycle. It's actually quite simple. Self discipline.nyou need to be prepared to make a change and commit to it. Also set achievable goals. If I has said, I'm going to run and completely change my diet, all at the same time there is no way I would have succeeded. Instead. I broke the goals in two. I decided to run first and completed the c25k 9 weeks, which the last run was a 5k event in the yarra valley. After that I focused on running for longer until I was able to run for 5 hours in the marathon. With the long running comes speed, my 5k time looks pretty sweet at the moment.

But now it's come time to get serious about what goes in. I am at the point where my running has stopped being effective in weight loss. And I need to drop some weight to be a better runner.....sounds like a viscous cycle again.

But in the last week. I have taken steps to break out again and get my diet sorted out. It turns out that all the diet programs have taught me a few things about nutrition, for example I know that eating more raw veg is the key...and after 1 week I'm already seeing benefits of having a green salad and a can of tuna for lunch on a daily basis.

Thenother side to this is that after a dramatic change to my body over the last 14 months, having lost 18kg. That is the way I perceive myself. It's such a complex issue I don't know where to start. In my mind I am still the 106kg behemoth hat I used to be. I don't like it when my clothes cling to me, I feel like I occupy to much space on the train, I just imagine the old me everywhere. I guess this is the cost of being so lazy for so long or is this the way my body and psyche is keeping me focused on eating right and keeping on running.

I am really starting to appreciate why people have body image issues.

What I have discovered is that breaking out of cycles is very rewarding and the amount of effort required to maintain change diminishes as the rewards from the change stack up.

So what does it really mean to be a runner. I have discovered I can do things that require an enormous amount of energy. I have discovered true clear mindedness. I have almost boundless energy and most importantly I know what it's like to sleep because you have burnt the days allocation of energy.

People like to see the pain, the joint issues, the rolled ankles, the blisters and the photos of exhaustion as bad things. For me running has bought so much to my life I really don't know the person I would be without it. It has filled a gap I never knew existed (probably because it was full of maccas wrappers) and given me a source of hard but achievable goals.

Goals and how to measure progress in a positive light

Yesterdays half marathon in Marysville was one of the hardest long runs I've ever done. For the first time I am really sore today. I had multiple muscles cramping during the run and after. Also because the run was partly on gravel roads I have a a toe that's almost more blister than toe.

I ran the 21kms in 2 hours and 15mins which is 7mins slower than my PB (2:08). I was asked if I was disappointed with my time. Hell no, I'm wrapped. The elevation profile for this course is nuts. In the last 8k there is 4k uphill then 4k down to the finish.

I ran with a woman who had a goal of running the whole way of a half marathon. I felt bad for her picking this one to do it. But she stuck to her goal and when I was running and walking my way up that nightmare hill she kept plodding along. Good for her. My goal for the day was to go for a long run in the countryside and enjoy the day.

I had originally entered the full marathon but it was going to be to hard on the family as it was a 7am start and we needed at least 2 hours to get up get ready and get there, so I dropped to the half. My wife voiced concern that I might feel like I failed after setting my sights on a marathon and dropping back to a half. But I didn't really see it that way so it was all good.

Setting goals when training for a specific race is tricky and there are a lot of things to consider. When preparing for the Melbourne marathon I decided my goal needed to be very clear so as not end up regretful or disappointed. My goal was to finish the whole race. To run when I could and walk when I needed to and I achieved exactly that.

Since then it appears that I'm not taking my goals seriously on a sub conscience level. Yesterdays goal was as I said to have a nice run in the countryside. However i couldn't shake the thoughts of "imagine if I could do this in under 2hours." I kept dispelling them but time and time again they came to the surface.

All my split time calculations and pace budgeting during the race were around a sub 2 hour race. For the first 5ks it was all about keeping pace around 5min30sec per k and reserving enough for a strong finish. Then the hills started and I threw the idea well and truly out the window...back to having a good time.

So even though I had a goal I didn't set out to achieve I still had a great run and am happy with my performance.

I had a colleague make a comment to me regarding my fastest 5k time 23:47. He said "I'm not far behind you" I asked him to qualify and he told me he had been doing 5 k runs on the treadmill at the gym and was doing them in 32mins. 9 minutes off a 5k is a lot of work, my very first 5k was 34 mins. That was a year ago or thereabouts. More importantly he missed the point that running on a treadmill is bio-mechanically different from running outside. When you run on a motorized treadmill you lift your foot, move it forward and put it down. It's the dragged back using the motor of the treadmill. Running outside you have to use muscle to push forward.

I don't think I could do treadmill running for 2 reasons. Firstly Im not fit in the right muscles for a treadmill and secondly I would rather have the mental distraction of rain, sun swooping magpies and route selection. I would go (more) insane after 30mins in the same place.

But the treadmill does have it's values in training. It's just not for me at this time.

New frontiers

One of my favorite running quotes by the late great Jim Fixx is "Running is not about trying to do something that no one else has done. It's about doing what anyone can do but very few choose to."

I love this quote because it drags my running into context. I am not doing anything amazing or incredible yet I see and hear constant evidence that I am inspiring others to run. This is an amazing thing in itself, to be responsible for people (who are in some cases only in distant contact with me) choosing to do something that nudges them outside their comfort zone and more importantly, away from the unhealthy danger zone I spent way to long lolling about like a beached whale in.

It keeps me running to know others are following me.

Anyway what got my thoughts on tis track is today's lunchtime run. I did something amazing (in me context). Actually I did 2 amazing things. Today's run was 5k and for the very first time every k was done in under 5 minutes. This gave me a grand total of 23 minutes and 47 seconds. This is 101 seconds faster than I have ever run 5ks in.

The second amazing thing I did was to run the first of these 5ks in 4 minutes and 4 seconds. This is an achievement that's hard to describe. In the context of the entire run it's belittled by the fact that every k was under 5 minutes, and alone it's no big deal because it was the first k and it's not hard to run fagots for one k especially the first one. However in the bigger picture I ran an awesome first k and still managed to keep the hammer down for the rest of the run.

For me it's important to have well defined goals, and post running the Melbourne marathon I have(had) 4.
- 5k under 25 mins
- 10k under 50 mins
- 1/2 marathon under 2 hours
- shave 1 hour off my marathon (under 4 hours would be great)

So in 3 weeks I have knocked one off the list.

I'm running a 1/2 marathon in Marysville on Sunday but I've been warned that due to the hills it's not a course for PBs. I'm not going to try for an amazing time on this one...just cruise and enjoy running in the bush.