Hard time to stay committed.

Its "that" time of year. The time when everyone has colds, its raining every time you want/need to run, and its a real challenge just to kick your own ass out the door.

Its so easy at the moment to not run.....its almost like I have more reasons not to run, than I have to run.

But I keep reminding myself, that I have omitted to running Melbourne marathon again this year and now I need to make sure I don't die doing it :)

So running in the rain and freezing cold wind yesterday I kept reminding myself "each time my foot hits the ground, its a step towards a successful marathon"

This was hard though because every time the dog looked at me (as much as she loves running) I felt like she was struggling to be out there as much as I was.

In the end we both had a good run. In the rain, in the cold....but at the end of the day I took another handful of steps towards Melbourne Marathon.

Its funny the way that challenges to being a runner, and living that life manifest themselves in the strangest ways.

For example travel for work....once upon a time, I would have packed work clothes and my laptop and been right to go. Now when I travel, its my garmin, runners, skins, shorts etc. I dont worry about if where I will be staying is nice, I look up google maps to see if there is anywhere to run around the place, and make sure that work doesn't get in the way of running in a new area.

Another good example, is food. Not the kind that I buy or choose to put in my mouth. Its the kind that sneaks up on you, and is half eaten before you realize what is going on. Another example is that at present, there is a BIG pack of tim tams in the kitchen...they literally have a sign on them that says "Please Eat" This is on a post it note, but to my eyes it may as well be on a billboard in letters the same height as I am. I know eating one or some of them is not good, I know I don't need them, and I know that I will feel bad for eating them if I succumb.....but it doesn't stop me staring at them like I have been walking across the desert for the last 2 weeks and they are a glass of ice water.....

In a discussion with a colleague the other day I was asked "how do you cope with stress" This was a general question but it stemmed from a discussion about parenting, husbanding and working etc....the answer is simple....I run.....

til next time


Daniel

How I see myself

THIS IS HOW I SEE MYSELF.

Of course, I'm quite convinced now that this is not what I look like....anymore. but I just cant shake the self image I have. It dosnt seem to matter what I achieve, or acomplish in running or life. 

For example. Saturday I ran a 1/2 marathon in the fastest time I have ever done. 1 Hour 59 Minutes and 44 seconds. Looking back at past posts I had 3 goals. 1) Sub 2 hour 1/2 marathon, 2) Sub 50 min 10k and to complete my second full marathon. This means that I achieved one of my goals last Saturday. On arriving home. my daughter had her running shoes on, and said with the cutest possible look on her little face "Daddy take me running" So off to the park for a quick jog with her we all went....It was very cute, and I in no way want to dampen the fires of enthusiasm my children are harboring for running.

Sunday, Mothers day, and more important the family run, which is all my son has talked about for weeks. 4k's round the tan, with the push chair for when the kids little legs need some help....no worries. Now my training of late, has involved a 10k run during lunch time at work twice a week, and then a longer run on the weekends (puffing billy, Run for the kids etc) so a 4k is not really anything for me to get worried about.,....well...let me say the anderson st hill, double push chair, and 25kg of kids strapped in....it had me working my ass off. But it was well worth it, we all finished the run as a family sweaty and proud of what we had done.

Then today, I was "needing" to run again. (more on this later) so 10k at lunch, it was cold, but dry, and I was on fire. It felt so good to be out there in the open, and at the end of the run, I had been running for an amazing 51 minutes and 53 seconds. Now, after a couple of weeks of 10k runs, I would say my average time for 10k is 55 mins give or take. So to complete this about 3 minutes faster than I expected was an amazing achievement.

Thats 35k in the last 4 days and yet I still see myself as the above picture. If I attempted what i have just achieved looking like that I would be a) unable to walk. b) in a coma, and or c)very dead.

Last week was hard. I had puffing billy run on the Sunday, then a week of training. Training mentally is great. Physically it sucks the big one. I stand at my desk at work (which is a point of amusement for everyone that walks past me ;) so being stuck in a room where its not practical to do anything but sit on the second most un-ergonomic chairs I have ever seen really gets my annoyance factor up.

Second to this, my wife had arrangements/commitments on the nights that I would usually run...actually she had something on every night that week, so running at night was out. After the bastard hills of puffing billy I decided a week of non-running wouldn't be too bad anyway, bit of recovery and all that. By the Thursday the physical symptoms were very obvious.....I couldn't stand still. My leg was shaking with a nervous twitch, I was on edge, anxious and not coping at all with not running. I did something late in the week which maybe says a little about the kind of person I am. 

The course that I was on, had an exam associated with it, and I booked the exam for the Friday afternoon. This seemed like a really good idea at the time, it would be fresh in my mind and all good. What actually happened was that my non-running symptoms, combined with the non-running anxiety, and the OMFG I have an exam that if I fail would be throwing away $200 anxiety. I was a mess, on the way there I was sub consciously looking for any excuse to run, oh that light is green better run, oh the tram is not there, better run,,,,etc.

Anyway I passed the exam and all was well, but it would have been much better had I been able to leverage off the quiet calm of a post run mind.

so back to my original point. Run for the kids, puffing billy, my 1/2 marathon training run, mothers day classic, and my amazing 10k time today were done by this guy:

A runner, a dad. a husband, and a much healthier man than the butterball at the top of the post!

Daniel