It feels like I have not run in months.
Its been a week and a half, I have injured my back. I AM GOING INSANE and I need to run.
I feel like I am about to explode, my thoughts seem like they are on the other side of a sheet of baking paper, I can see them, collect them but they are clouded and distorted.
I feel tense, stressed and angry at nothing.
All because I haven't run in a week and a half.
And that's because I hurt my back picking up my little girl to put her on a swing and wham my back was stuffed.
I am lucky that my wife was so understanding and supportive as its put a huge amount of pressure on her, we were on our way back from camping when it happened so she had to unpack and sort out the kids etc why I lay in pain.
Ice, pain killers, anti infamatorys and rest. Its starting to come good, and I feel like I can run but I just dont know what the fall out will be if I do.
I know I need to run if I don't I will have a mental breakdown, but if I do my back might revert to a state of pain.
I think a small run after the kids are in bed tonight may be on the cards.....it might be one of the only cards I have to play of I don't play it, I feel like I will be out of the game/
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Friday, October 14, 2011
1 week on
It's been almost 1 week since the marathon, and the hardest thing has been not running.
Running a marathon is an odd thing, you train for it for a long tim gradually building up k's per week until you run out of training time. You stop a week or so before the event, putting your self through s period without the one thing thats been driving you for so long, it's consumed your every thought for so long.
This subject of intense focus leaves a huge hole in your life, it's only a week of tapering but t feels like a year, you start to doubt your ability to run, question your preparation, and commitment.
The week after the marathon is similar, last year I waited one week exactly, then I ran a 10k. I ended up bed ridden with flu like symptoms for 3 days after that. This year I have felt ready to run since the Tuesday after the marathon. But have held back, remembering last year, I have decided to wait....but only until Monday.
Mondays we (myself and the guys at work) usually run a 5k so I will run that and see how I go. If that's all good then it's a 10k on Tuesday and another on thursday, from there it's back into routine.
I miss running, I want to be running again.
It's weird when speaking to another runner, he was very sympathetic to my marathon time, pointing out that I hadn't done enough long runs, my total k's per week were too low etc. This was kind of odd, I didn't mind my time so much, it was long, yeah ok it could have been better but at the end of the day who cares if I did it in 5 hours or 4, the point is I ran my second marathon.
I would have liked to have run more and walked less, but at the same time I probably would have ran slower and done about the same time still I did what I could.
At the end of the day people will compare you with their experiences, this guy was an experienced marathoner who when running them didn't have kids. I have managed to fit in being daddy, uni, work and training for a marathon and if that means I run 5 hour marathons until the load lightens the I will keep running 5 hour marathons.
This whole experience has put a new spin on my running and kids that I haven't realized before. If I run too much on the weekends it takes time away from my kids, and too little and my running suffered. The trade off is I run when I can and on marathon day run slower times, for now. My kids are at an age when they get upset that I will be out for 3 hours on a tun, but I imagine as they grow up that will change.
I like to think that my daughter and son will be there with me one day running their first 5k, 10k and whatever distances after that they aspire to. But I would never make them run, only show them what I get from running and see if they decide to follow.
It's hard to predict if they will or won't, I think they will want to run, but if they don't I can only hope they don't spend as much of their lives being as fat and lazy as I have.
Running a marathon is an odd thing, you train for it for a long tim gradually building up k's per week until you run out of training time. You stop a week or so before the event, putting your self through s period without the one thing thats been driving you for so long, it's consumed your every thought for so long.
This subject of intense focus leaves a huge hole in your life, it's only a week of tapering but t feels like a year, you start to doubt your ability to run, question your preparation, and commitment.
The week after the marathon is similar, last year I waited one week exactly, then I ran a 10k. I ended up bed ridden with flu like symptoms for 3 days after that. This year I have felt ready to run since the Tuesday after the marathon. But have held back, remembering last year, I have decided to wait....but only until Monday.
Mondays we (myself and the guys at work) usually run a 5k so I will run that and see how I go. If that's all good then it's a 10k on Tuesday and another on thursday, from there it's back into routine.
I miss running, I want to be running again.
It's weird when speaking to another runner, he was very sympathetic to my marathon time, pointing out that I hadn't done enough long runs, my total k's per week were too low etc. This was kind of odd, I didn't mind my time so much, it was long, yeah ok it could have been better but at the end of the day who cares if I did it in 5 hours or 4, the point is I ran my second marathon.
I would have liked to have run more and walked less, but at the same time I probably would have ran slower and done about the same time still I did what I could.
At the end of the day people will compare you with their experiences, this guy was an experienced marathoner who when running them didn't have kids. I have managed to fit in being daddy, uni, work and training for a marathon and if that means I run 5 hour marathons until the load lightens the I will keep running 5 hour marathons.
This whole experience has put a new spin on my running and kids that I haven't realized before. If I run too much on the weekends it takes time away from my kids, and too little and my running suffered. The trade off is I run when I can and on marathon day run slower times, for now. My kids are at an age when they get upset that I will be out for 3 hours on a tun, but I imagine as they grow up that will change.
I like to think that my daughter and son will be there with me one day running their first 5k, 10k and whatever distances after that they aspire to. But I would never make them run, only show them what I get from running and see if they decide to follow.
It's hard to predict if they will or won't, I think they will want to run, but if they don't I can only hope they don't spend as much of their lives being as fat and lazy as I have.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Race review
5 hours 1 minute and 44 seconds or thereabouts.
That was yesterday, my second marathon, the second time I have run 42.2k, and the second time it's taken me more than 5 hours.
My wife asked if I was disappointed with my time, and the answer is no, I am happy. I have come to terms with being a slow marathoner. If I get faster then I get faster, if not then shit happens, while it's a race it's not just about the amount of time it takes to finish, it's as much about being a part of something bigger, and simply finishing.
So here is the buts of the race that stood out.
At the start I said goodbye and good luck to me ex-colleague who gave me a ride in as he was placing himself for a faster run. The air was filled with nervous tension from the first timers, excitement and an element of apprehension for the pain that we were all about to endure.
Across the line and away we go. I settled into a pace slightly lower than I had planned with the first couple of k's at 6:20min/k, but I didn't mind too much as at this point I had decided that chasing times wasn't really why I was here. I focused on easy strides and cruised along with the crowd.
A the 4.2k mark some dick head announced to the runners around him that we were 10% through, some people need yo learn to shut up. Shortly after this I saw one dude wearing Vibram five fingers, and another wearing bare feet....that's hardcore.
Along st kilda road I saw a guy with a hat shaped like a block of cheese, and another one with a knitted beard warmer.
I had to stop for a wee break in Albert park, and once that was sorted I was happily cruising along.
At the 9K aid station I spotted a colleague who was volunteering so I made sure I grabbed a water from him.
I noticed that a lot of the running clubs had their own aid stations for their members this year, which was great for them to pick up gels drinks etc.
We hit StKilda and headed towards Port Melbourne. I like this leg because the faster runners are on the other side of the road, and it appears that you are running to the spirit of Tasmania, along here I saw 2 people on bikes in tiger suits who were growling at the runners.....very odd indeed.
Got to the turnaround, and there is about 4k where you can see the 20k marker as it was a big inflatable arch. This was not a nice part of the race as it just didn't feel like I was getting any closer to it. Along here I was feeling good, legs were happily ticking over and although I had resolved to just run it, I noticed that the 4:30 pacer was behind me, which caused a lot of confusion as I would have sworn he was in front of me. Of course this had me thinking what if, what time etc.
At about the 23k mark, the what ifs where laid to rest when I had to start having some walking breaks, as I was starting to struggle. I had felt this welling up for about 4k and I had told myself no walking until 25k but I didn't meet that goal. I kicked my own ass back in to the task at hand and pushed on.
Somewhere between StKilda and Elwood I almost hurled. There was a stench of rotten seafood coming from some kind of creek or storm water running off, and it was bad.
We ran through a couple of parks this year and came back onto the road to continue on to the turnaround, one of the parks was awesome, we ran up a slight hill and had an amazing view of the beach and the crashing waves.
Back on the road and around the turnaround I spotted a Spartan(a person who has completed 10 Melbourne marathons) and I asked him how he was doing, he said "I'm fucked mate" I asked him how many is this for him, and it was his 10th Melbourne, and last he told me. I kept running leaving him behind, and went round the turnaround. He gave me a wave as I passed him in the other direction.
The people that live down here are really nice, despite having no car access to their houses a lot of them are out the front with lollies, some with bananas and all of them with encouragement.
Back across the puke river and on to StKilda, a lot of people are passing me now, but a lot are walking, especially after the 30k mark. I am packing a dude that looks like a midget who is running and walking too so we are constantly passing one another.
Just before the 30k marker some weird old dude is crossing the road and slows down in front of me and stares me down....all I can think is get out of way you sill old bugger..and eventually he did. I really don't know what the hell that was all about.
Through StKilda and back towards the city. Lots of people telling us we were on the home stretch now, and to keep up the amazing work. We passed all the running club tables but because their members had all passed by they were handing out everything they had left, water, gels, power aid etc. There was a guy who had gone and bought 2 boxes of icy poles and was giving them to runners. Community spirit is alive and well.
On StKilda road I spotted a runner ahead and focused on pacing him. I passed him as he was running slower, then he passed me when I was walking. We continued on for several k like this. Eventually we started to encourage each other and he offered me 2 weird looking pills. I asked what they were and he said they were some sugar lollies, so I took them. At this stage I needed all the help I could get. No cramps yet but I was hurting.
We continued to sort of run together, and had a chat, it was his first, and he had been suffering through ITB cramps since the 5k mark. That really sucked for him.
Around and under the arts center, and some other runner how we were doing for time, 4:11 which I said wasn't too bad for 36k.
At the this point we hit some minor hills through the park and back up towards the shrine,down domain road, I got chatting with a nice lady spartan at this point who was asking me how many I had done etc. When I said it was my second she said, well your in now, I replied with well and truly in probably in over my head but in all the same.
Along StKilda road back to up to Flinders now, and and there were a lot of aid stations, my friend with the ITB issues is powering a head now shooting for a sub 5 hours. At this stage I just didn't have it in me to push it was hard enough to keep running. I realized that there was about 1.2k to go.
Along Flinders st and I could see the MCG the end was in sight, I started to push, then I realized that if I could push enough then I would be able to crack the 5 hour mark....shame I didn't realize this earlier.
I ran hard passing a lot of people, pushing as hard as I could. I was running at a sub 6m/k pace which felt like I was sprinting, around through the backstreets behind the G and then onto the last bit of road...up hill....some race director needs to have his ass kicked for this. 41.9k and they have the finish line up a hill....damn, doesn't matter pushed anyway to get up there, and over the line. The garmin says it took me 5:01:44 we will see what the official results say.
Up the hill and there was my wife and the kids, screaming there hearts out in support. This gave me an amazing lift and got my ass up the hill and over the finish line.
At the finish line I almost collapsed. One of the marshals came and made sure I wasn't going to hurl collapse or both, and then we got ushered out of the finish area by a cop. I had a drink, collected my show bag, called my wife and arranged a meeting place. On the way there I got the most insanely intense calf cramps I have ever experienced.
One calf first and it was so intense I couldn't put my foot flat on the ground at all. Then the other got jealous and wanted some cramp action, I was standing on tippy toes in agony while a lot of people just looked on. Eventually I forced my feet back on the ground and hobbled off to the meeting place.
Compression socks on in the car and they have been ever since (excluding showers etc) these are amazing wonderful things and I owe them a lot. My calves feel great.
My wife made a comment on facebook about the supporters at the marathon and how its hard for them to get organised, wrangle kids and be there for their runners. I would like to say a huge thanks to everyone who made the effort to be there for runners, and all the other runners.
The supporters really made the day, from handing out snakes, icy poles, cheering us on no matter that the slower runners were still plodding along. They drove us to run when we were walking, keep running when we wanted to stop, and finish the marathon.
So I would like to acknowledge that its hard for the supports to be there on the day but it really does make all the difference. So thank you everyone.
Daniel
That was yesterday, my second marathon, the second time I have run 42.2k, and the second time it's taken me more than 5 hours.
My wife asked if I was disappointed with my time, and the answer is no, I am happy. I have come to terms with being a slow marathoner. If I get faster then I get faster, if not then shit happens, while it's a race it's not just about the amount of time it takes to finish, it's as much about being a part of something bigger, and simply finishing.
So here is the buts of the race that stood out.
At the start I said goodbye and good luck to me ex-colleague who gave me a ride in as he was placing himself for a faster run. The air was filled with nervous tension from the first timers, excitement and an element of apprehension for the pain that we were all about to endure.
Across the line and away we go. I settled into a pace slightly lower than I had planned with the first couple of k's at 6:20min/k, but I didn't mind too much as at this point I had decided that chasing times wasn't really why I was here. I focused on easy strides and cruised along with the crowd.
A the 4.2k mark some dick head announced to the runners around him that we were 10% through, some people need yo learn to shut up. Shortly after this I saw one dude wearing Vibram five fingers, and another wearing bare feet....that's hardcore.
Along st kilda road I saw a guy with a hat shaped like a block of cheese, and another one with a knitted beard warmer.
I had to stop for a wee break in Albert park, and once that was sorted I was happily cruising along.
At the 9K aid station I spotted a colleague who was volunteering so I made sure I grabbed a water from him.
I noticed that a lot of the running clubs had their own aid stations for their members this year, which was great for them to pick up gels drinks etc.
We hit StKilda and headed towards Port Melbourne. I like this leg because the faster runners are on the other side of the road, and it appears that you are running to the spirit of Tasmania, along here I saw 2 people on bikes in tiger suits who were growling at the runners.....very odd indeed.
Got to the turnaround, and there is about 4k where you can see the 20k marker as it was a big inflatable arch. This was not a nice part of the race as it just didn't feel like I was getting any closer to it. Along here I was feeling good, legs were happily ticking over and although I had resolved to just run it, I noticed that the 4:30 pacer was behind me, which caused a lot of confusion as I would have sworn he was in front of me. Of course this had me thinking what if, what time etc.
At about the 23k mark, the what ifs where laid to rest when I had to start having some walking breaks, as I was starting to struggle. I had felt this welling up for about 4k and I had told myself no walking until 25k but I didn't meet that goal. I kicked my own ass back in to the task at hand and pushed on.
Somewhere between StKilda and Elwood I almost hurled. There was a stench of rotten seafood coming from some kind of creek or storm water running off, and it was bad.
We ran through a couple of parks this year and came back onto the road to continue on to the turnaround, one of the parks was awesome, we ran up a slight hill and had an amazing view of the beach and the crashing waves.
Back on the road and around the turnaround I spotted a Spartan(a person who has completed 10 Melbourne marathons) and I asked him how he was doing, he said "I'm fucked mate" I asked him how many is this for him, and it was his 10th Melbourne, and last he told me. I kept running leaving him behind, and went round the turnaround. He gave me a wave as I passed him in the other direction.
The people that live down here are really nice, despite having no car access to their houses a lot of them are out the front with lollies, some with bananas and all of them with encouragement.
Back across the puke river and on to StKilda, a lot of people are passing me now, but a lot are walking, especially after the 30k mark. I am packing a dude that looks like a midget who is running and walking too so we are constantly passing one another.
Just before the 30k marker some weird old dude is crossing the road and slows down in front of me and stares me down....all I can think is get out of way you sill old bugger..and eventually he did. I really don't know what the hell that was all about.
Through StKilda and back towards the city. Lots of people telling us we were on the home stretch now, and to keep up the amazing work. We passed all the running club tables but because their members had all passed by they were handing out everything they had left, water, gels, power aid etc. There was a guy who had gone and bought 2 boxes of icy poles and was giving them to runners. Community spirit is alive and well.
On StKilda road I spotted a runner ahead and focused on pacing him. I passed him as he was running slower, then he passed me when I was walking. We continued on for several k like this. Eventually we started to encourage each other and he offered me 2 weird looking pills. I asked what they were and he said they were some sugar lollies, so I took them. At this stage I needed all the help I could get. No cramps yet but I was hurting.
We continued to sort of run together, and had a chat, it was his first, and he had been suffering through ITB cramps since the 5k mark. That really sucked for him.
Around and under the arts center, and some other runner how we were doing for time, 4:11 which I said wasn't too bad for 36k.
At the this point we hit some minor hills through the park and back up towards the shrine,down domain road, I got chatting with a nice lady spartan at this point who was asking me how many I had done etc. When I said it was my second she said, well your in now, I replied with well and truly in probably in over my head but in all the same.
Along StKilda road back to up to Flinders now, and and there were a lot of aid stations, my friend with the ITB issues is powering a head now shooting for a sub 5 hours. At this stage I just didn't have it in me to push it was hard enough to keep running. I realized that there was about 1.2k to go.
Along Flinders st and I could see the MCG the end was in sight, I started to push, then I realized that if I could push enough then I would be able to crack the 5 hour mark....shame I didn't realize this earlier.
I ran hard passing a lot of people, pushing as hard as I could. I was running at a sub 6m/k pace which felt like I was sprinting, around through the backstreets behind the G and then onto the last bit of road...up hill....some race director needs to have his ass kicked for this. 41.9k and they have the finish line up a hill....damn, doesn't matter pushed anyway to get up there, and over the line. The garmin says it took me 5:01:44 we will see what the official results say.
Up the hill and there was my wife and the kids, screaming there hearts out in support. This gave me an amazing lift and got my ass up the hill and over the finish line.
At the finish line I almost collapsed. One of the marshals came and made sure I wasn't going to hurl collapse or both, and then we got ushered out of the finish area by a cop. I had a drink, collected my show bag, called my wife and arranged a meeting place. On the way there I got the most insanely intense calf cramps I have ever experienced.
One calf first and it was so intense I couldn't put my foot flat on the ground at all. Then the other got jealous and wanted some cramp action, I was standing on tippy toes in agony while a lot of people just looked on. Eventually I forced my feet back on the ground and hobbled off to the meeting place.
Compression socks on in the car and they have been ever since (excluding showers etc) these are amazing wonderful things and I owe them a lot. My calves feel great.
My wife made a comment on facebook about the supporters at the marathon and how its hard for them to get organised, wrangle kids and be there for their runners. I would like to say a huge thanks to everyone who made the effort to be there for runners, and all the other runners.
The supporters really made the day, from handing out snakes, icy poles, cheering us on no matter that the slower runners were still plodding along. They drove us to run when we were walking, keep running when we wanted to stop, and finish the marathon.
So I would like to acknowledge that its hard for the supports to be there on the day but it really does make all the difference. So thank you everyone.
Daniel
Friday, October 7, 2011
Countdown Part 3
I'm starting to feel like a little yappy dog who won't stop barking. I have so much owing through my mind at the moment and it's pouring out in blog and Facebook posts.
I feel like I am starting to win the battle this morning, the negative arguments about why I can't and or shouldn't try and run the marathon on Sunday are losing any substance to their points.
The positive thoughts are gaining, and I can feel myself starting to embrace them and swim in the sea of negativity.
I can cover the distance, run (preferably), walk, crawl it doesn't matter how, what matters is the most amazing life changing accomplishment, my first marathon, will not be my last.
I guess I sometimes expect that people will love my running as much as I do, and then I get disappointed when they don't.
As runners we are surrounded by A society who have not embraced their primal instinct to run. We are designed for running long distances, which is why most first time marathoners are middle aged men, they feel an urge yo run a long way. This primal instinct comes from genetic coding, a body designed for distance running, and the feeling our ancestors got when running an animal to death.
I have said it before running is a metaphor for living, but it is so much more. Running is answering the primal urges deep within your psyche, embracing their passive efforts to move you along in search of food or water.
This becomes evident when you listen to runners discuss race strategy. As an adult talking to another adult I have never experienced some of the topics, that I have with other runners. Chaffing, pre-race poo, cutting of toenails all sorts of things that are not lady or gentlemanlike to talk about. But the primal runner knows that they are important things for the hunt.
So again I need to say, on Sunday, in 2 sleeps, I will run a marathon, I will love it, I will hunt my prey and run the fucker to death.
Daniel :)
I feel like I am starting to win the battle this morning, the negative arguments about why I can't and or shouldn't try and run the marathon on Sunday are losing any substance to their points.
The positive thoughts are gaining, and I can feel myself starting to embrace them and swim in the sea of negativity.
I can cover the distance, run (preferably), walk, crawl it doesn't matter how, what matters is the most amazing life changing accomplishment, my first marathon, will not be my last.
I guess I sometimes expect that people will love my running as much as I do, and then I get disappointed when they don't.
As runners we are surrounded by A society who have not embraced their primal instinct to run. We are designed for running long distances, which is why most first time marathoners are middle aged men, they feel an urge yo run a long way. This primal instinct comes from genetic coding, a body designed for distance running, and the feeling our ancestors got when running an animal to death.
I have said it before running is a metaphor for living, but it is so much more. Running is answering the primal urges deep within your psyche, embracing their passive efforts to move you along in search of food or water.
This becomes evident when you listen to runners discuss race strategy. As an adult talking to another adult I have never experienced some of the topics, that I have with other runners. Chaffing, pre-race poo, cutting of toenails all sorts of things that are not lady or gentlemanlike to talk about. But the primal runner knows that they are important things for the hunt.
So again I need to say, on Sunday, in 2 sleeps, I will run a marathon, I will love it, I will hunt my prey and run the fucker to death.
Daniel :)
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Countdown Part 2
3 Sleeps to go and I am starting to feel sick every time the marathon comes to the front burner of my thoughts.
I have arranged a lift in on the day which is one less thing to worry about, and the family will be at the finish line or somewhere close if its bucketing down.
All I can think about is 42.2 kilometers. about 21.1 of which I am not too concerned about, maybe that number even extends to 30 of them, but there at least 12.2ks that are the real unknown.
I am fitter than last year, and about 4kg lighter, I have run faster short distances in the last 3 months than I ever thought possible, these things have to count for something don't they?
all that is left now is to wait the remaining 3 2 full days, sleep the last 3 sleeps and then run like my body was designed by the maker of evolution (depending on your faith of choice) intended it to.
42.2k, 42.2k, 42.2k
I can do it. I can run it. I can beat last years time.
I am going to run a full marathon on Sunday faster than I did it last year.
I am going to run a full marathon on Sunday faster than I did it last year.
I am going to run a full marathon on Sunday faster than I did it last year.
Daniel
I have arranged a lift in on the day which is one less thing to worry about, and the family will be at the finish line or somewhere close if its bucketing down.
All I can think about is 42.2 kilometers. about 21.1 of which I am not too concerned about, maybe that number even extends to 30 of them, but there at least 12.2ks that are the real unknown.
I am fitter than last year, and about 4kg lighter, I have run faster short distances in the last 3 months than I ever thought possible, these things have to count for something don't they?
all that is left now is to wait the remaining 3 2 full days, sleep the last 3 sleeps and then run like my body was designed by the maker of evolution (depending on your faith of choice) intended it to.
42.2k, 42.2k, 42.2k
I can do it. I can run it. I can beat last years time.
I am going to run a full marathon on Sunday faster than I did it last year.
I am going to run a full marathon on Sunday faster than I did it last year.
I am going to run a full marathon on Sunday faster than I did it last year.
Daniel
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Countdown
4 more sleeps until I have to get up and run my second marathon and I feel like I'm drowning in a sea of self doubt.
The questions are always there nagging at the back of my mind like a neighbors dog who just won't stop barking, and no matter where you are in the house the bark bark bark bark is always there.
The questions that are really hammering me at the moment are
- am I fit enough to even attempt this distance?
- what happens if I can't finish?
- why does it all matter?
Running has changed for me, from something I need to do, into something that I am trying to challenge myself with and I don't feel like running at all right now.
So the question becomes how do I get to keep my cake and eat it too...
JFDI seems to be the only way my second marathon is going to happen Just fucking do it. Don't think about it too much, tell yourself you are going to do it, and get off your ass and run on Sunday.
Positive affirmations seem to work wonders on me, on runs where I have not made the distance on reflection I remember the negative thoughts winning on those days. For example I remember thinking why would anyone do this to themselves.
On the more successful runs I was able to quash the negative with positive thoughts like "I am going to run 30k" and repeating it in my head over and over like some weird mantra.
And I guess the issue is that I do think about things way to much, I plan for all sorts of scenarios, and the training of my job has forced my thinking way outside the usual box. This means I play out scenarios to a point where the enter the realm of extremely unlikely.
So I think the message here after a blog filled with metaphors is that I need to swim in a sea of negativity and in the mean time eat right, don't lose any sleep over it and fuck it what happens on the day happens, once it's passed I can run (for at least 6 months or so) for the sake of running, enjoy the morning runs in summertime, and love running again for a bit because I have nothing to prove.
The questions are always there nagging at the back of my mind like a neighbors dog who just won't stop barking, and no matter where you are in the house the bark bark bark bark is always there.
The questions that are really hammering me at the moment are
- am I fit enough to even attempt this distance?
- what happens if I can't finish?
- why does it all matter?
Running has changed for me, from something I need to do, into something that I am trying to challenge myself with and I don't feel like running at all right now.
So the question becomes how do I get to keep my cake and eat it too...
JFDI seems to be the only way my second marathon is going to happen Just fucking do it. Don't think about it too much, tell yourself you are going to do it, and get off your ass and run on Sunday.
Positive affirmations seem to work wonders on me, on runs where I have not made the distance on reflection I remember the negative thoughts winning on those days. For example I remember thinking why would anyone do this to themselves.
On the more successful runs I was able to quash the negative with positive thoughts like "I am going to run 30k" and repeating it in my head over and over like some weird mantra.
And I guess the issue is that I do think about things way to much, I plan for all sorts of scenarios, and the training of my job has forced my thinking way outside the usual box. This means I play out scenarios to a point where the enter the realm of extremely unlikely.
So I think the message here after a blog filled with metaphors is that I need to swim in a sea of negativity and in the mean time eat right, don't lose any sleep over it and fuck it what happens on the day happens, once it's passed I can run (for at least 6 months or so) for the sake of running, enjoy the morning runs in summertime, and love running again for a bit because I have nothing to prove.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Runners high runners low.
There is a concept known to those who run as runners high. It's (in my experience) a flood of endorphins that washes over you, making you feel high and it is amazing. Interestingly I have only experienced this once, and that was week 6 of the c25k program, after I ran for 20 minutes straight for the first time, in my life.
Looking back this achievement was huge, I had committed to something, and worked hard to achieve that goal.
I don't get runners high anymore, but I get lots of runners low. I describe this as when I simply can't run the way I want to.
In some ways I am like a perpetual toddler who is frustrated that he can't walk, he takes a few steps and falls down. This is how running feels to me at times, I make some big achievements but then get injured, or busy or lazy and I don't run the way I need to to get to that next goal.
I have been thinking a lot about goals for next year, what comes next.
Do I focus on longer distances, maybe an 50k or something?
Or do I go shorter and faster, aim for a 1:45 half marathon?
Do I run because running is what I do?
Do I look at tri's?
I just don't know where I want to go with running next year and there really are so many possibilities.
At this stage I am starting to think that I want to maintain a level of fitness so that once a month I can run into work, which involves a 4am wake up, and 3 and a bit hours running, and I think this would be an awesome foundation for next years marathon.
I know I probably focus on the marathon in 2 weeks, and now what happens next, but the setting of my next goal is a part of what will get me through the 42.2k in less than 2 weeks time. Last year after the marathon I experienced an extreme sense of being lost and I attribute this to net having my next goals set.
So my goals right now are:
I am going to run 42.2k on Sunday the 9th of October
Run to work at least once before the end of the year
On an interesting side note, I discovered that the historical distance for the marathon was actually 24miles, not the 26.2miles we run today. This was changed in the early 1900's at the London Olympics as the windsor family wanted the start line at once of their castles and the distance to the finishing line at the stadium was 2.2 miles longer...
Looking back this achievement was huge, I had committed to something, and worked hard to achieve that goal.
I don't get runners high anymore, but I get lots of runners low. I describe this as when I simply can't run the way I want to.
In some ways I am like a perpetual toddler who is frustrated that he can't walk, he takes a few steps and falls down. This is how running feels to me at times, I make some big achievements but then get injured, or busy or lazy and I don't run the way I need to to get to that next goal.
I have been thinking a lot about goals for next year, what comes next.
Do I focus on longer distances, maybe an 50k or something?
Or do I go shorter and faster, aim for a 1:45 half marathon?
Do I run because running is what I do?
Do I look at tri's?
I just don't know where I want to go with running next year and there really are so many possibilities.
At this stage I am starting to think that I want to maintain a level of fitness so that once a month I can run into work, which involves a 4am wake up, and 3 and a bit hours running, and I think this would be an awesome foundation for next years marathon.
I know I probably focus on the marathon in 2 weeks, and now what happens next, but the setting of my next goal is a part of what will get me through the 42.2k in less than 2 weeks time. Last year after the marathon I experienced an extreme sense of being lost and I attribute this to net having my next goals set.
So my goals right now are:
I am going to run 42.2k on Sunday the 9th of October
Run to work at least once before the end of the year
On an interesting side note, I discovered that the historical distance for the marathon was actually 24miles, not the 26.2miles we run today. This was changed in the early 1900's at the London Olympics as the windsor family wanted the start line at once of their castles and the distance to the finishing line at the stadium was 2.2 miles longer...
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Hurting
I just want to be running right now, and that doesn't seem to change.
But i have injured my left leg. And even better this years injury was completely avoidable. There was just no need to be doing flips on the trampoline with the kids, they would have been just as happy with me doing basic jumping with them.
Anyway the leg is healing slowly but surely but the build up to the marathon is becoming a nightmare that feels like it will never end. With 2 and a bit weeks to go until race day I should be running a lot, instead I'm nit running at all. This means 2 things to me, firstly, I may not do much better time wise than last year, and second, I am not dealing with the stress of work, and the build up yo marathon anxiety very well at all.
I have lost my outlet for stress and this is going to be a big problem for me over the next fortnight.
It's ironic really, runners need to taper before a long run, for me in training this usually means the dropping of one run late in the week to "save some running up" for the weekend long run. It's interesting to note that sometimes when I taper I feel like a spring has been wound up really tight in a toy car, and when I do run, I w ant to run really fast and hard until the spring returns to a normal tension.
Tapering for a marathon means very little running for at least the week before, the issue I have with this (and this may just be my personality) is that I get very anxious about the distance, I start with the negative thoughts and this year they are all about wether I can make the distance or not.
The longest run in training has been 30k and I bounced back from that really well, much much better than last year. If fact 3 days after my 30k I was able to run a 10k which last year the time would have been more like 5 days after.
So I am fitter this year and my recovery times are great, but a 30k is more like running half a marathon than 3/4 of one. Last year the hardest part was the last 7k, this is when I really suffered from cramping, emotionally I was just there to push on, cover the distance and to hell with trying for a time.
This year I want to do better, deep down I really do, but I am struggling with the commitment that I need to guarantee I will do better. I can commit emotionally, but I am feeling very time poor at the moment. I have a super supportive family who let me disappear for 1/2 a day every weekend for my long runs, well my wife does, the kids have started to understand that dadda will be out all afternoon running. But I still feel like I am stealing time from my family to fuel my run, and that means I have to be very selfish to run long runs, and with that come guilt. I know that the family understand don't
mind me running but I just can't help feeling guilty.
There is an offset to this, the kids are catching my passion to run. They live to run, they still talk about wanting to do another family run, as we did the mothers day classic as a family this year. I want them to run, I wish that I had grown up with that outlet. To think of all the places I have been as a teenager and young adult and not run breaks my heart sometimes. But I will never force them into it, they need to do it because they want to, all I can do is set the example and see if they follow, and this is the way it must be.
So as the pain in my leg throbs away, hopefully healing my damaged muscle, and the heaviness that is settling on my psyche starts to weigh down on my demeanor, I will try to focus on one thing " I run because I love to, I will run the full 42.2k, I will smile, I will hurt and I will love it"
But i have injured my left leg. And even better this years injury was completely avoidable. There was just no need to be doing flips on the trampoline with the kids, they would have been just as happy with me doing basic jumping with them.
Anyway the leg is healing slowly but surely but the build up to the marathon is becoming a nightmare that feels like it will never end. With 2 and a bit weeks to go until race day I should be running a lot, instead I'm nit running at all. This means 2 things to me, firstly, I may not do much better time wise than last year, and second, I am not dealing with the stress of work, and the build up yo marathon anxiety very well at all.
I have lost my outlet for stress and this is going to be a big problem for me over the next fortnight.
It's ironic really, runners need to taper before a long run, for me in training this usually means the dropping of one run late in the week to "save some running up" for the weekend long run. It's interesting to note that sometimes when I taper I feel like a spring has been wound up really tight in a toy car, and when I do run, I w ant to run really fast and hard until the spring returns to a normal tension.
Tapering for a marathon means very little running for at least the week before, the issue I have with this (and this may just be my personality) is that I get very anxious about the distance, I start with the negative thoughts and this year they are all about wether I can make the distance or not.
The longest run in training has been 30k and I bounced back from that really well, much much better than last year. If fact 3 days after my 30k I was able to run a 10k which last year the time would have been more like 5 days after.
So I am fitter this year and my recovery times are great, but a 30k is more like running half a marathon than 3/4 of one. Last year the hardest part was the last 7k, this is when I really suffered from cramping, emotionally I was just there to push on, cover the distance and to hell with trying for a time.
This year I want to do better, deep down I really do, but I am struggling with the commitment that I need to guarantee I will do better. I can commit emotionally, but I am feeling very time poor at the moment. I have a super supportive family who let me disappear for 1/2 a day every weekend for my long runs, well my wife does, the kids have started to understand that dadda will be out all afternoon running. But I still feel like I am stealing time from my family to fuel my run, and that means I have to be very selfish to run long runs, and with that come guilt. I know that the family understand don't
mind me running but I just can't help feeling guilty.
There is an offset to this, the kids are catching my passion to run. They live to run, they still talk about wanting to do another family run, as we did the mothers day classic as a family this year. I want them to run, I wish that I had grown up with that outlet. To think of all the places I have been as a teenager and young adult and not run breaks my heart sometimes. But I will never force them into it, they need to do it because they want to, all I can do is set the example and see if they follow, and this is the way it must be.
So as the pain in my leg throbs away, hopefully healing my damaged muscle, and the heaviness that is settling on my psyche starts to weigh down on my demeanor, I will try to focus on one thing " I run because I love to, I will run the full 42.2k, I will smile, I will hurt and I will love it"
Friday, September 16, 2011
25 days
With only 25 days until the marathon, the gnawing hound of anxiety is starting show it's face. Like last year it really huts me when I see the MCG which is twice a day on the train to and from work.
Best I take that hound for a run.
Best I take that hound for a run.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Pledge
There are 4 weekends until the marathon, and I have formulated a plan.
Weekend Sept 10/11- 30k run.
Weekend Sept 17/18 - no or short run.
Weekend Sept 24/25 - 35k run.
Weekend Oct 1/2 - 15k run.
This coupled with 2 10k runs during the week, a massage session on Friday the 9th and another one around the 23rd.
The race day anxiety has started to creep up on me, I feel it especially when I go past the MCG on the train. I don't need to tell anyone who runs what a massive undertaking this is for me, but for the non runners, to put it in context, the marathon takes a commitment to pain, suffering and mental anguish. You need to commit to dipping into the extremities of the human body's energy stores and pull out every bit of it....just to pit foot in front of foot.
I find the distance of a marathon interesting, it stems from the roman herald
Pheidippides running to Sparta. He ran 240k in 2 days to the battlefield, then ran another 42.2k to athens, where he dropped dead. The point is that the distance has very old origins, and it's particularly interesting that it's just far enough to test the abilities of most runners.
I ran 30k 2 weekends ago then 3 days later another 10k, last year after the marathon I ran a 10k a week after the marathon, but because I had dug so deep on the day, within hours I got flu like symptoms and ended up in bed for 3 days, in my opinion this is a treat example if what distance does to you.
Aside from the physical aspects and the health benefits, the psychological growth that occurs during marathon training is huge. You learn so much about your self, like what it takes to push on no matter the pain you are feeling, what it takes to kick you own ass out the door to clock up more k's all so you can do it again on race day.
Then race day comes and you start to think about what you have done to get here, the race becomes only a small part of the whole endeavor, and really it is, my running has been shaped around race day for the past 8 months at least, running faster and harder in short runs, and then lately slower and longer to get my body used to punishment for long periods of time.
There is more I could have done to prepare, more k's I could have run, I could have eaten better, cross trained more but all these things require commitment, and I'm digging deep in commitment as it is, family, work, now uni, and running are sucking me dry on that front.
On the day I will run, I will cover the distance and I will do it faster than last year, and that's my commitment to running.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Change of plans
So it seems that my marathon training has not gone as well as I would have liked. By this stage I was hoping to be up to running 30k runs every weekend, and keeping up my 20ks during the week. I don't see this as a failure on my part, its simply because life has gotten in the way of running, which happens.
I still plan on running the 42k, I have just abandoned the concept of doing it in a certain time. I would like to achieve a 4:30hrs marathon, but at the end of the day if I can take 10 minutes of last years time and get in under 5 hours I will be stoked.
So I have 6 training weekends to get sorted out to cover the 42ks. The plan is to run long runs every second weekend (30ks) and 21k runs every other weekend, in addition I plan to keep up the 2x10k runs during lunch breaks up until the Tuesday before the marathon.
I guess deep down there is an element of disappointment in having to change my goals but at the end of the day with everything else on my plate its just not realistic to try and run the k's I need to in order to break the 4 hour mark.
Perhaps next year? who knows?
On that note I am considering a change of goals for the first half of this year and the remainder after the marathon, I am thinking that focusing on the 21k distance could be good for a bit, get really quick over that distance, and try and get my comfortable average pace down to 5/min K's. At the moment I can sustain 5:30min/ks for most of the 21k runs.
This would also feed into bettering my 10k and 5k times, which I would like to get to sub 50mins, and closer to 20 mins respectively.
Anyway I still have 6 weeks of training and 7 weeks till the marathon so anything is possible in that time.
Until then I will keep putting foot in front of foot and clock up as many K's as I can.
I still plan on running the 42k, I have just abandoned the concept of doing it in a certain time. I would like to achieve a 4:30hrs marathon, but at the end of the day if I can take 10 minutes of last years time and get in under 5 hours I will be stoked.
So I have 6 training weekends to get sorted out to cover the 42ks. The plan is to run long runs every second weekend (30ks) and 21k runs every other weekend, in addition I plan to keep up the 2x10k runs during lunch breaks up until the Tuesday before the marathon.
I guess deep down there is an element of disappointment in having to change my goals but at the end of the day with everything else on my plate its just not realistic to try and run the k's I need to in order to break the 4 hour mark.
Perhaps next year? who knows?
On that note I am considering a change of goals for the first half of this year and the remainder after the marathon, I am thinking that focusing on the 21k distance could be good for a bit, get really quick over that distance, and try and get my comfortable average pace down to 5/min K's. At the moment I can sustain 5:30min/ks for most of the 21k runs.
This would also feed into bettering my 10k and 5k times, which I would like to get to sub 50mins, and closer to 20 mins respectively.
Anyway I still have 6 weeks of training and 7 weeks till the marathon so anything is possible in that time.
Until then I will keep putting foot in front of foot and clock up as many K's as I can.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Birthday Speech
Im not one to make speeches at occasions aside from those where there is simply no choice....i.e weddings.
But while running today I decided I was going to make a speech for my birthday this year, but as a blog post.
So here goes.
3 Years ago my wife was pregnant with my second child.I weighed in at 106kg, why never diagnosed I probably had high cholesterol, blood pressure issues and was a perfect candidate for type 2 diabetes.
2 Years ago I had started running, I was almost done with the couch to 5k program, and I was preparing myself for my first official event. The timing of the event lined up perfectly for my final run of the c25k, and my first full 5k run. I ran that 5k in about 35 minutes. I weighed in about 95kg and was feeling pretty good about myself.
1 Year ago I was recovering from my rolled ankle, ready to run no matter what medical professional said I couldn't, and was preparing for my first marathon. I started running again just before my birthday and I managed the marathon in 5:08. I weighed about 90kg and had completed about 12 21k training runs, so my confidence in my running was great.
This year things are a bit of a muddle. I am training for my second marathon, so far (touch wood) I have had an injury free year. I currently weigh in at 86kg, and I am confident in my running - to some extent.
The issue this year is one of psychology and confidence. I know I can run, that is for certain but can I run 42k in 8 weeks time? The last 2 training runs I have done have not gone so well. 2 weeks ago I had health issues which were trigger or exacerbated by my 20k run. Today I set out to finally nail the 28k run from Wandin to Warburton which still eludes me, but I was running much better today. The issue was twofold, first I started out too hard, and as such was struggling after 21k to keep going and second I had severe cramping in my legs. I called it a day at 25k and will have yet another bash at it some time soon.
It occurred to me today while running that I use running as a metaphor for living. I realized that when I turned 32 and was running, I really started living. Before that I endured life but now life is an endurance event :) Training to run marathons is really living, and you don't know what its like to be full of energy until you have given every ounce f what you have to a run, you don't know what it really feels like to give something your all until you have given it.
People talk about giving 100% to something, but I don't believe that its possible unless that something that benefits only you.
I have also decided that running and living is about rhythm. Humans are attracted to music. I'm sure that when you close your eyes and think about it you can hear your favorite song. Running is like this, you find your rhythm and you run to it. People often ask me if I listen to music while I run, and the answer is no, when I tell them this they usually ask how I keep myself entertained for long runs, as if the thought of spending 3 hours inside your own head was like eating roadkill.
when I think about this, I have decided that listening to music while running for me would be like living someone else's life. Of course this is purely my opinion and each to his/her own but I find when I run to music my rhythm settles into the musics beat, and my pace alters slightly with the change of songs, oh and I kind of like spending time inside my own head, with a busy busy job, two little munchkins and a million other things to do, running is a nice escape from the hustle and bustle of everyday.
So I know that this post is a little scattered but so are my thoughts at the moment, I get introspective and a little melancholy when I think about life, and I find that birthdays have me reviewing events to date. On the upside, since I started running my fears are about not being able to run, and how I would be able to survive without running, rather than heart disease and diabetes.
So Happy Birthday to me!
But while running today I decided I was going to make a speech for my birthday this year, but as a blog post.
So here goes.
3 Years ago my wife was pregnant with my second child.I weighed in at 106kg, why never diagnosed I probably had high cholesterol, blood pressure issues and was a perfect candidate for type 2 diabetes.
2 Years ago I had started running, I was almost done with the couch to 5k program, and I was preparing myself for my first official event. The timing of the event lined up perfectly for my final run of the c25k, and my first full 5k run. I ran that 5k in about 35 minutes. I weighed in about 95kg and was feeling pretty good about myself.
1 Year ago I was recovering from my rolled ankle, ready to run no matter what medical professional said I couldn't, and was preparing for my first marathon. I started running again just before my birthday and I managed the marathon in 5:08. I weighed about 90kg and had completed about 12 21k training runs, so my confidence in my running was great.
This year things are a bit of a muddle. I am training for my second marathon, so far (touch wood) I have had an injury free year. I currently weigh in at 86kg, and I am confident in my running - to some extent.
The issue this year is one of psychology and confidence. I know I can run, that is for certain but can I run 42k in 8 weeks time? The last 2 training runs I have done have not gone so well. 2 weeks ago I had health issues which were trigger or exacerbated by my 20k run. Today I set out to finally nail the 28k run from Wandin to Warburton which still eludes me, but I was running much better today. The issue was twofold, first I started out too hard, and as such was struggling after 21k to keep going and second I had severe cramping in my legs. I called it a day at 25k and will have yet another bash at it some time soon.
It occurred to me today while running that I use running as a metaphor for living. I realized that when I turned 32 and was running, I really started living. Before that I endured life but now life is an endurance event :) Training to run marathons is really living, and you don't know what its like to be full of energy until you have given every ounce f what you have to a run, you don't know what it really feels like to give something your all until you have given it.
People talk about giving 100% to something, but I don't believe that its possible unless that something that benefits only you.
I have also decided that running and living is about rhythm. Humans are attracted to music. I'm sure that when you close your eyes and think about it you can hear your favorite song. Running is like this, you find your rhythm and you run to it. People often ask me if I listen to music while I run, and the answer is no, when I tell them this they usually ask how I keep myself entertained for long runs, as if the thought of spending 3 hours inside your own head was like eating roadkill.
when I think about this, I have decided that listening to music while running for me would be like living someone else's life. Of course this is purely my opinion and each to his/her own but I find when I run to music my rhythm settles into the musics beat, and my pace alters slightly with the change of songs, oh and I kind of like spending time inside my own head, with a busy busy job, two little munchkins and a million other things to do, running is a nice escape from the hustle and bustle of everyday.
So I know that this post is a little scattered but so are my thoughts at the moment, I get introspective and a little melancholy when I think about life, and I find that birthdays have me reviewing events to date. On the upside, since I started running my fears are about not being able to run, and how I would be able to survive without running, rather than heart disease and diabetes.
So Happy Birthday to me!
Monday, July 11, 2011
From 20 to 10 minutes
My first run of the couch to 5k was 20 minutes of intervals. 20 minutes 3 times a week. It all started with 20 minutes, 6 weeks in I ran my first 20 minutes solid block of running.
My first 5k run took about 34 minutes, today I ran 5k in 23:16. This got me thinking about what can be achieved in 10 minutes.
10 minutes with the kids is priceless, 10 minutes at work can seem like a lifetime, 10 minutes can be 2k's of running time or 10 minutes in a marathon can seem like 2 lifetimes.
This blog post has taken weeks to write due to insane work load and a very active home life.
Since starting this post I have developed a new issue. My running mojo has taken a hit, I have health problems and it all seems to be stress related.
For the last 2 weeks I have been performing the tasks of 2-3 people, things like this just happen in IT from time to time and it comes with the territory but this time I haven't done so well coping with the stress. After 2 weeks of long days, no breaks and worst of all mo lunchtime runs I was about ready to collapse. I set myself up for a 28k run on a Sunday, arranged for the wife and kids to meet me at the end and drive me back to the car, all was good.
5ks in I felt sluggish, I just felt like it was way harder than it should be at this point. I persevered and by 17k just knew something was not right. I called my ever understanding wife and arranged to cut my run short. It went from being a 28k to a 19.5k. That was ok by me as I had come to terms with cutting it short from the first k.
The wife and kids met me at a playground where we had a play for a bit. While there I had the first symptoms of a migraine, flashy lights in my vision. At this point I ushered everyone into the car, as I knew what came next.
I got home and collapsed on the bed, covered my head with a pillow and rode the waves of pain that would not abate for anything. I had to drag myself into the shower before I could get into bed proper because 20k of sweat, dust and grime has no home in our bed.
Showered and cleansed, but still wanting to die because of the pain I crawled into bed, and there I stayed for 4 hours after which I felt ok, my brain felt bruised but the majority of the pain was gone.
Monday, I didn't feel too bad, still brain bruised, but not too bad. (brain bruising is how I describe when there is no pain except when you cough or move quickly)
Tuesday saw the return of my headache, this was not so much like a migraine, more like a nasty headache, but I decided to run, and see if that helped. A strange thing happened on my run, I started seeing flashy lights in the periphery of my field of view, the colleague I was running with became invisible as he ran next to me. This lasted for the last 2k of my run and fir about 20 minutes after. Then my headache got angry with me, so I smacked it with some panadene, and all was well.
Wednesday I decided to try and sleep it off. Things weren't going too bad until I got stressed about a trivial matter and then the flashy peripheral vision came back. I slept for a couple of hours and was ok again.
Apart from some short periods of headache, and brain bruising I seem to be ok now. I haven't run since last Tuesday, and I plan to run today with some colleagues incase something happens.
The worst bit is that I'm scared to run, I'm worried about what this means to my marathon preparation and to general wellbeing.
When you drop a lot of weight, and become active something in your psyche tells you that you have become invincible, You see people around you getting sick and your enhanced runner immune system shakes off all but the worst if what's going around.
Then you get sick, and it scares the crap out of you that running might make it worse, and not running might make it worse, all you can see is things getting worse so it's hard to get back on the horse, but you do it all the same.
My first 5k run took about 34 minutes, today I ran 5k in 23:16. This got me thinking about what can be achieved in 10 minutes.
10 minutes with the kids is priceless, 10 minutes at work can seem like a lifetime, 10 minutes can be 2k's of running time or 10 minutes in a marathon can seem like 2 lifetimes.
This blog post has taken weeks to write due to insane work load and a very active home life.
Since starting this post I have developed a new issue. My running mojo has taken a hit, I have health problems and it all seems to be stress related.
For the last 2 weeks I have been performing the tasks of 2-3 people, things like this just happen in IT from time to time and it comes with the territory but this time I haven't done so well coping with the stress. After 2 weeks of long days, no breaks and worst of all mo lunchtime runs I was about ready to collapse. I set myself up for a 28k run on a Sunday, arranged for the wife and kids to meet me at the end and drive me back to the car, all was good.
5ks in I felt sluggish, I just felt like it was way harder than it should be at this point. I persevered and by 17k just knew something was not right. I called my ever understanding wife and arranged to cut my run short. It went from being a 28k to a 19.5k. That was ok by me as I had come to terms with cutting it short from the first k.
The wife and kids met me at a playground where we had a play for a bit. While there I had the first symptoms of a migraine, flashy lights in my vision. At this point I ushered everyone into the car, as I knew what came next.
I got home and collapsed on the bed, covered my head with a pillow and rode the waves of pain that would not abate for anything. I had to drag myself into the shower before I could get into bed proper because 20k of sweat, dust and grime has no home in our bed.
Showered and cleansed, but still wanting to die because of the pain I crawled into bed, and there I stayed for 4 hours after which I felt ok, my brain felt bruised but the majority of the pain was gone.
Monday, I didn't feel too bad, still brain bruised, but not too bad. (brain bruising is how I describe when there is no pain except when you cough or move quickly)
Tuesday saw the return of my headache, this was not so much like a migraine, more like a nasty headache, but I decided to run, and see if that helped. A strange thing happened on my run, I started seeing flashy lights in the periphery of my field of view, the colleague I was running with became invisible as he ran next to me. This lasted for the last 2k of my run and fir about 20 minutes after. Then my headache got angry with me, so I smacked it with some panadene, and all was well.
Wednesday I decided to try and sleep it off. Things weren't going too bad until I got stressed about a trivial matter and then the flashy peripheral vision came back. I slept for a couple of hours and was ok again.
Apart from some short periods of headache, and brain bruising I seem to be ok now. I haven't run since last Tuesday, and I plan to run today with some colleagues incase something happens.
The worst bit is that I'm scared to run, I'm worried about what this means to my marathon preparation and to general wellbeing.
When you drop a lot of weight, and become active something in your psyche tells you that you have become invincible, You see people around you getting sick and your enhanced runner immune system shakes off all but the worst if what's going around.
Then you get sick, and it scares the crap out of you that running might make it worse, and not running might make it worse, all you can see is things getting worse so it's hard to get back on the horse, but you do it all the same.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Strange happenings.
When I started running it was simply to run..now my drive is evolving. I am starting to run fast. I have discovered a new fuel for my motivation. This is an odd sensation. I wanted to achieve some good times this year across a few distances, sub 25 minutes for 5k, sub 50 minutes for 10k and a sub 2 hour half marathon(21k).
I haven't been running a lot of 5k runs but I reckon I could nail sub 25mins, and later in the year I will give that a bash. My best 10k is at 51:30 so that is close, and last Sunday I smashed the sub 2 hour 1/2 for the second time, except this time was 1:50:57.
This has raised a couple of internal questions ( and external from some other runners) am I setting goals that are too easy to achieve, should I be aiming for faster, and what should I shoot for in Octobers marathon.
I have the run Melbourne 1/2 on the 17th July, and my goal was sub 2 hour, I averaged 5:17m/k on my half on Sunday. If I can average 5 mins my time would be 1:45, is this a better goal? Then issue I have with this is twofold, firstly runs with lots of people tend to have bottlenecks, which makes pb's hard to achieve, second I have no idea what the course is like, last year I had to sit this run out due to injury.
So what do I shoot for in October, last year the goal was to finish, indie that in 5:08. This year I was hoping for 4:30, but it's looking like I should shoot for sub 4 hours...I just need to decide if I want that pressure.
I'm starting to see som subconscious strategy in my goals setting. I'm starting to think that I set achievable goals so as to not make running a stressful activity, so that I will not get discouraged by perceived failures, when the truth is that while I am out there pounding my body, putting one foot in front of the other it's impossible to fail. No one that enters an even comes last, everyone wins because they chose to compete against laziness, against sedentary life and against the voice in their head that says bugger it, it's 6am on a winter Sunday I just want to stay in bed.
There is something very satisfying about completing a run that you didn't really feel like doing in the first place. Try it sometime, running with a head cold is a good one, clears the head like nothing else, but it can be really hard to get out the door. Afterwards you will feel like you really achieved something because you overcame the little devil sitting on your shoulder saying "take something for that cold and go back to bed"
So get your ass out the door and run.
Daniel.
I haven't been running a lot of 5k runs but I reckon I could nail sub 25mins, and later in the year I will give that a bash. My best 10k is at 51:30 so that is close, and last Sunday I smashed the sub 2 hour 1/2 for the second time, except this time was 1:50:57.
This has raised a couple of internal questions ( and external from some other runners) am I setting goals that are too easy to achieve, should I be aiming for faster, and what should I shoot for in Octobers marathon.
I have the run Melbourne 1/2 on the 17th July, and my goal was sub 2 hour, I averaged 5:17m/k on my half on Sunday. If I can average 5 mins my time would be 1:45, is this a better goal? Then issue I have with this is twofold, firstly runs with lots of people tend to have bottlenecks, which makes pb's hard to achieve, second I have no idea what the course is like, last year I had to sit this run out due to injury.
So what do I shoot for in October, last year the goal was to finish, indie that in 5:08. This year I was hoping for 4:30, but it's looking like I should shoot for sub 4 hours...I just need to decide if I want that pressure.
I'm starting to see som subconscious strategy in my goals setting. I'm starting to think that I set achievable goals so as to not make running a stressful activity, so that I will not get discouraged by perceived failures, when the truth is that while I am out there pounding my body, putting one foot in front of the other it's impossible to fail. No one that enters an even comes last, everyone wins because they chose to compete against laziness, against sedentary life and against the voice in their head that says bugger it, it's 6am on a winter Sunday I just want to stay in bed.
There is something very satisfying about completing a run that you didn't really feel like doing in the first place. Try it sometime, running with a head cold is a good one, clears the head like nothing else, but it can be really hard to get out the door. Afterwards you will feel like you really achieved something because you overcame the little devil sitting on your shoulder saying "take something for that cold and go back to bed"
So get your ass out the door and run.
Daniel.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
What are you running from?
On occasion I am asked what I am running from. Usually I just laugh this off and say nah that's not what it's about.
There are several ways to really answer the question, aside from shrugging it off.
I run away from something, but it's not really something that's easy to admit to. I run away from the weak undisciplined fat person I was for the majority of my life.
I run for the energy I have everyday, for the satisfaction of knowing I have extended my life expectancy by heaps, for the confidence that discipline gives me, and because the reasons to run almost always outweigh the reasons not to.
I realized that people who don't run physically, still run metaphorically. They run from the effort that it takes to haul ass out the door. They run from the commitment it takes to just do it. They run from change.
How often I get told that my running can only end in long term injury is amazing, this I respond to with, then it will be time to swim, or bike but for now running has transformed me into who I am.
We all run, some physically, some metaphorically, and for some riding or swimming is their running, but the primal human instinct is to fight or flight.
I chose to do both as flight is my weapon to fight the person I no longer want to be.
It has also recently occurred to me how stark the contrast is between the roles in my life, and how little overlap there is. The old saying "wherever you are be present" is becoming something very tangible for me.
On a run day I play 3 parts. First when I get up it's the daddy/hubby role, making porridge and babychinos for the kids, the it's out the door for work role, performing my day job, but at about 11:30 it's time to change, clothes and role to runner. Back from my run and it's work and then daddy/hubby again.
It's oddly amusing to me, that the parts of my life are so separate, and so clearly defined.
I was asked recently how do you excel at something. The on,y answer I have is " have the discipline to force yourself out the door no matter what, just do it" (Nike really picked a good slogan there which I never really got until I became a runner)
There are several ways to really answer the question, aside from shrugging it off.
I run away from something, but it's not really something that's easy to admit to. I run away from the weak undisciplined fat person I was for the majority of my life.
I run for the energy I have everyday, for the satisfaction of knowing I have extended my life expectancy by heaps, for the confidence that discipline gives me, and because the reasons to run almost always outweigh the reasons not to.
I realized that people who don't run physically, still run metaphorically. They run from the effort that it takes to haul ass out the door. They run from the commitment it takes to just do it. They run from change.
How often I get told that my running can only end in long term injury is amazing, this I respond to with, then it will be time to swim, or bike but for now running has transformed me into who I am.
We all run, some physically, some metaphorically, and for some riding or swimming is their running, but the primal human instinct is to fight or flight.
I chose to do both as flight is my weapon to fight the person I no longer want to be.
It has also recently occurred to me how stark the contrast is between the roles in my life, and how little overlap there is. The old saying "wherever you are be present" is becoming something very tangible for me.
On a run day I play 3 parts. First when I get up it's the daddy/hubby role, making porridge and babychinos for the kids, the it's out the door for work role, performing my day job, but at about 11:30 it's time to change, clothes and role to runner. Back from my run and it's work and then daddy/hubby again.
It's oddly amusing to me, that the parts of my life are so separate, and so clearly defined.
I was asked recently how do you excel at something. The on,y answer I have is " have the discipline to force yourself out the door no matter what, just do it" (Nike really picked a good slogan there which I never really got until I became a runner)
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Hard time to stay committed.
Its "that" time of year. The time when everyone has colds, its raining every time you want/need to run, and its a real challenge just to kick your own ass out the door.
Its so easy at the moment to not run.....its almost like I have more reasons not to run, than I have to run.
But I keep reminding myself, that I have omitted to running Melbourne marathon again this year and now I need to make sure I don't die doing it :)
So running in the rain and freezing cold wind yesterday I kept reminding myself "each time my foot hits the ground, its a step towards a successful marathon"
This was hard though because every time the dog looked at me (as much as she loves running) I felt like she was struggling to be out there as much as I was.
In the end we both had a good run. In the rain, in the cold....but at the end of the day I took another handful of steps towards Melbourne Marathon.
Its funny the way that challenges to being a runner, and living that life manifest themselves in the strangest ways.
For example travel for work....once upon a time, I would have packed work clothes and my laptop and been right to go. Now when I travel, its my garmin, runners, skins, shorts etc. I dont worry about if where I will be staying is nice, I look up google maps to see if there is anywhere to run around the place, and make sure that work doesn't get in the way of running in a new area.
Another good example, is food. Not the kind that I buy or choose to put in my mouth. Its the kind that sneaks up on you, and is half eaten before you realize what is going on. Another example is that at present, there is a BIG pack of tim tams in the kitchen...they literally have a sign on them that says "Please Eat" This is on a post it note, but to my eyes it may as well be on a billboard in letters the same height as I am. I know eating one or some of them is not good, I know I don't need them, and I know that I will feel bad for eating them if I succumb.....but it doesn't stop me staring at them like I have been walking across the desert for the last 2 weeks and they are a glass of ice water.....
In a discussion with a colleague the other day I was asked "how do you cope with stress" This was a general question but it stemmed from a discussion about parenting, husbanding and working etc....the answer is simple....I run.....
til next time
Daniel
Its so easy at the moment to not run.....its almost like I have more reasons not to run, than I have to run.
But I keep reminding myself, that I have omitted to running Melbourne marathon again this year and now I need to make sure I don't die doing it :)
So running in the rain and freezing cold wind yesterday I kept reminding myself "each time my foot hits the ground, its a step towards a successful marathon"
This was hard though because every time the dog looked at me (as much as she loves running) I felt like she was struggling to be out there as much as I was.
In the end we both had a good run. In the rain, in the cold....but at the end of the day I took another handful of steps towards Melbourne Marathon.
Its funny the way that challenges to being a runner, and living that life manifest themselves in the strangest ways.
For example travel for work....once upon a time, I would have packed work clothes and my laptop and been right to go. Now when I travel, its my garmin, runners, skins, shorts etc. I dont worry about if where I will be staying is nice, I look up google maps to see if there is anywhere to run around the place, and make sure that work doesn't get in the way of running in a new area.
Another good example, is food. Not the kind that I buy or choose to put in my mouth. Its the kind that sneaks up on you, and is half eaten before you realize what is going on. Another example is that at present, there is a BIG pack of tim tams in the kitchen...they literally have a sign on them that says "Please Eat" This is on a post it note, but to my eyes it may as well be on a billboard in letters the same height as I am. I know eating one or some of them is not good, I know I don't need them, and I know that I will feel bad for eating them if I succumb.....but it doesn't stop me staring at them like I have been walking across the desert for the last 2 weeks and they are a glass of ice water.....
In a discussion with a colleague the other day I was asked "how do you cope with stress" This was a general question but it stemmed from a discussion about parenting, husbanding and working etc....the answer is simple....I run.....
til next time
Daniel
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
How I see myself
Of course, I'm quite convinced now that this is not what I look like....anymore. but I just cant shake the self image I have. It dosnt seem to matter what I achieve, or acomplish in running or life.
For example. Saturday I ran a 1/2 marathon in the fastest time I have ever done. 1 Hour 59 Minutes and 44 seconds. Looking back at past posts I had 3 goals. 1) Sub 2 hour 1/2 marathon, 2) Sub 50 min 10k and to complete my second full marathon. This means that I achieved one of my goals last Saturday. On arriving home. my daughter had her running shoes on, and said with the cutest possible look on her little face "Daddy take me running" So off to the park for a quick jog with her we all went....It was very cute, and I in no way want to dampen the fires of enthusiasm my children are harboring for running.
Sunday, Mothers day, and more important the family run, which is all my son has talked about for weeks. 4k's round the tan, with the push chair for when the kids little legs need some help....no worries. Now my training of late, has involved a 10k run during lunch time at work twice a week, and then a longer run on the weekends (puffing billy, Run for the kids etc) so a 4k is not really anything for me to get worried about.,....well...let me say the anderson st hill, double push chair, and 25kg of kids strapped in....it had me working my ass off. But it was well worth it, we all finished the run as a family sweaty and proud of what we had done.
Then today, I was "needing" to run again. (more on this later) so 10k at lunch, it was cold, but dry, and I was on fire. It felt so good to be out there in the open, and at the end of the run, I had been running for an amazing 51 minutes and 53 seconds. Now, after a couple of weeks of 10k runs, I would say my average time for 10k is 55 mins give or take. So to complete this about 3 minutes faster than I expected was an amazing achievement.
Thats 35k in the last 4 days and yet I still see myself as the above picture. If I attempted what i have just achieved looking like that I would be a) unable to walk. b) in a coma, and or c)very dead.
Last week was hard. I had puffing billy run on the Sunday, then a week of training. Training mentally is great. Physically it sucks the big one. I stand at my desk at work (which is a point of amusement for everyone that walks past me ;) so being stuck in a room where its not practical to do anything but sit on the second most un-ergonomic chairs I have ever seen really gets my annoyance factor up.
Second to this, my wife had arrangements/commitments on the nights that I would usually run...actually she had something on every night that week, so running at night was out. After the bastard hills of puffing billy I decided a week of non-running wouldn't be too bad anyway, bit of recovery and all that. By the Thursday the physical symptoms were very obvious.....I couldn't stand still. My leg was shaking with a nervous twitch, I was on edge, anxious and not coping at all with not running. I did something late in the week which maybe says a little about the kind of person I am.
The course that I was on, had an exam associated with it, and I booked the exam for the Friday afternoon. This seemed like a really good idea at the time, it would be fresh in my mind and all good. What actually happened was that my non-running symptoms, combined with the non-running anxiety, and the OMFG I have an exam that if I fail would be throwing away $200 anxiety. I was a mess, on the way there I was sub consciously looking for any excuse to run, oh that light is green better run, oh the tram is not there, better run,,,,etc.
Anyway I passed the exam and all was well, but it would have been much better had I been able to leverage off the quiet calm of a post run mind.
so back to my original point. Run for the kids, puffing billy, my 1/2 marathon training run, mothers day classic, and my amazing 10k time today were done by this guy:
A runner, a dad. a husband, and a much healthier man than the butterball at the top of the post!
Daniel
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
In love...again
For the last few months I have been in a running rut...I guess if my glass was half full it would be called a maintenance period..but if my glass was half full I would have been powering along instead of wallowing in the rut.
I have been content with 5k training runs 3 times a week, but a few weeks ago I realized I am entered in 13,14 & 21k runs that I don't know if I have what it takes to run.
So I got off my butt, last week I ran 3 10k training runs, which was amazing psychologically and physically. I am happy I can cover the distances in the runs I'm entered in now, but my goals are slightly shifted.
I have decided I want to achieve average 5min30sec kilometers across all distances.
Getting off my ass can be accredited to a few things, firstly I had my massage therapist treat my ankle which after 2 treatments and several bruises is at about 90% of what it was pre rolling. Secondly I swam/rode/ran the family triathlon with 3 of my nephews this year, and I saw how my passion for running had impacted my nephews, on in particular is developing a very healthy passion for sport, which is something I wish I had as a teenager. To influence someone by my running makes it incredibly rewarding.
Secondly I was going through the scenario of where I would have been from a health perspective had I not turned my fitness around. Would I have diabetes yet, heart disease, would I be able to walk up a flight of stairs without dying. This put my achievement in a new light, all of a sudden I realized that I have managed to take one foot out of the grave and kick morbid obesity in the ass with it.
Lastly we got a new trampoline for the kids. This is a little odd but, I really like our new trampoline, it's big enough for me, and then kids just love time on there with me. I really want to be able to do a forward flip, and more importantly teach the kids to do tramp tricks. There is no was the fat old me could have done this, as by now without running I would be over the weight rating for the trampoline. Instead I'm doing flips, and jumps so the kids have a role model.
Running now feel like I am working towards something again, each step is a reward for changing my life, each step sends out a spiritual shockwave that hits my kids and pushes them towards an active life away from a sedentary one, it seems that the shockwave extended further than I first imagined, which makes running even more worth it.
I no longer run for myself, I run for my family, and for the feeling of being endorphin stoned :)
So I am in love with it all again, fitness, running, the new trampoline and especially the impact it all has on my family.
I have been content with 5k training runs 3 times a week, but a few weeks ago I realized I am entered in 13,14 & 21k runs that I don't know if I have what it takes to run.
So I got off my butt, last week I ran 3 10k training runs, which was amazing psychologically and physically. I am happy I can cover the distances in the runs I'm entered in now, but my goals are slightly shifted.
I have decided I want to achieve average 5min30sec kilometers across all distances.
Getting off my ass can be accredited to a few things, firstly I had my massage therapist treat my ankle which after 2 treatments and several bruises is at about 90% of what it was pre rolling. Secondly I swam/rode/ran the family triathlon with 3 of my nephews this year, and I saw how my passion for running had impacted my nephews, on in particular is developing a very healthy passion for sport, which is something I wish I had as a teenager. To influence someone by my running makes it incredibly rewarding.
Secondly I was going through the scenario of where I would have been from a health perspective had I not turned my fitness around. Would I have diabetes yet, heart disease, would I be able to walk up a flight of stairs without dying. This put my achievement in a new light, all of a sudden I realized that I have managed to take one foot out of the grave and kick morbid obesity in the ass with it.
Lastly we got a new trampoline for the kids. This is a little odd but, I really like our new trampoline, it's big enough for me, and then kids just love time on there with me. I really want to be able to do a forward flip, and more importantly teach the kids to do tramp tricks. There is no was the fat old me could have done this, as by now without running I would be over the weight rating for the trampoline. Instead I'm doing flips, and jumps so the kids have a role model.
Running now feel like I am working towards something again, each step is a reward for changing my life, each step sends out a spiritual shockwave that hits my kids and pushes them towards an active life away from a sedentary one, it seems that the shockwave extended further than I first imagined, which makes running even more worth it.
I no longer run for myself, I run for my family, and for the feeling of being endorphin stoned :)
So I am in love with it all again, fitness, running, the new trampoline and especially the impact it all has on my family.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Applied learnings
I recently had to sit an exam for a work related industry certification I have been working on for about 3 years now.
This particular exam was my nemesis. I sat it for the first time about 2 years ago and failed. I then decided in a moment of stupidity to book and sit it the next day.
So how does this fit in my running blog?
I don't think I have ever experienced a pressure wave of anxiety like I did in the build up to this exam. Physically shaking and feeling nausea the night before. But I had a secret weapon, my learnings from running.
Prior to running in an event there are certain concerns that cross my mind like what if I can't cover the distance, what if I get an injury and have to bail out, and worst of all (and most consistently) what if I come dead last.
I would not say that I have ever really suffered anxiety issues, as I always try to be pragmatic when it comes to expectations. But on occasion we lose site of what we are capable as our sub-conscious tells us how we will fail...even though we are more than capable of success.
Recently I have been overwhelmed with the feeling that I am loosing touch with my inner runner. I don't feel like I am filled with passion for running any more, and that everything else seems to get in the way of training runs.
When I step back and look at what is going on around me at the moment, it seems that my life is so full that running is getting squeezed out. I need to take stock and prioritize my activities to include running again, as the reduction in K's has resulted in an increase in stress related symptoms. I have started biting my lip again, I am getting sores on my scalp again, and I am getting pissed off at work a lot more than I have in a long time.
The longest run I have logged this yeah is 10K. I need to start bumping up my K's, I need to focus on my goals, and I need to get passionate again about running.
Its 8 months until Melbourne Marathon and I want to be ready, I want to succeed, I want my family to be proud of me.
This particular exam was my nemesis. I sat it for the first time about 2 years ago and failed. I then decided in a moment of stupidity to book and sit it the next day.
So how does this fit in my running blog?
I don't think I have ever experienced a pressure wave of anxiety like I did in the build up to this exam. Physically shaking and feeling nausea the night before. But I had a secret weapon, my learnings from running.
Prior to running in an event there are certain concerns that cross my mind like what if I can't cover the distance, what if I get an injury and have to bail out, and worst of all (and most consistently) what if I come dead last.
I would not say that I have ever really suffered anxiety issues, as I always try to be pragmatic when it comes to expectations. But on occasion we lose site of what we are capable as our sub-conscious tells us how we will fail...even though we are more than capable of success.
Recently I have been overwhelmed with the feeling that I am loosing touch with my inner runner. I don't feel like I am filled with passion for running any more, and that everything else seems to get in the way of training runs.
When I step back and look at what is going on around me at the moment, it seems that my life is so full that running is getting squeezed out. I need to take stock and prioritize my activities to include running again, as the reduction in K's has resulted in an increase in stress related symptoms. I have started biting my lip again, I am getting sores on my scalp again, and I am getting pissed off at work a lot more than I have in a long time.
The longest run I have logged this yeah is 10K. I need to start bumping up my K's, I need to focus on my goals, and I need to get passionate again about running.
Its 8 months until Melbourne Marathon and I want to be ready, I want to succeed, I want my family to be proud of me.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Calm
After a 5k run the other day I realized that I had completed the whole run without thinking about anything. I think this means that I have successfully reduced the internal turmoil that has haunted me for the past 20 odd years.
Its an odd sensation not thinking, especially since my job is to think, over analyze and work trough issues to come up with solutions to complex problems, in some ways its almost like I make simple issues in my life complex because I am better at dealing with them that way,
I ran in the Melbourne sports summer sunset series Melbourne Zoo 8k run last Wednesday, and it was amazing. The run got me thinking about how most runners must experience a similar phenomenon when running, especially in a race.
In this case I drove there alone, as the race started at the kids bed time, so it wasn't going to work taking them to this one. I listened to music in the car, so there was constant noise, I didn't spend any time inside my head really, as it was also heavy traffic.
I was doing this one alone, no one I knew to meet up with or chat to while I waited, and given my need to be early for everything I had a fair amount of time to kill. I managed to secure a shady spot on the grass and just watched the people milling around, meeting up with friends, securing their kids while the registered or got their race packs, and generally preparing. It was during this time that I started to really reflect on the noise.
There is constant chatter, some people get nervous and get chatty, some people are relaxed and chatty, and some are catching up with running colleagues and are chatty, not for me, I was silent, just observing.
The noise levels are magnified at the start line, as the nervous talkers anxiety levels bump up, the friends try to get in some last lines of conversation. The calm people tend to withdraw into them selves at this point, and you see them start to watch the chatters.
The siren sounds, and the runners are off. Everyone concentrates on their pace, not tripping and not running over the top of other people.
For at least the first 100m there is only the sound of foot steps. This is such an odd time after so much noise, everything goes calm and quiet except for the thump thump thump of peoples feet.
This is a trap.
This is where people collectively form a rhythm and pace as a pack, instead of finding their own groove, and as a result its very easy to start too fast or too slow and upset your whole run.
This is where people collectively form a rhythm and pace as a pack, instead of finding their own groove, and as a result its very easy to start too fast or too slow and upset your whole run.
At the start of a race its important to position yourself appropriately in relation to your expected time. Fast people forwards, slow people back, and walkers at the very back. This is really important and most event organizers realize this, but in the case of the Zoo run they kind of lost the plot. There was no marshaling, no advice for walkers to the rear, and they started the 4 & 8k events at the same time.
What happened was a mess. I put my self about 1/4 of the way from the start as this is usually a good place for me and it was a small field so it should have been fine. The issue with this is that being an event held around the zoo a lot of people planned to walk the 4k and do a spot of sight seeing, whereas several of us were there to run the 8k.
The 4k walkers were way too far up the front, and a lot of us runners had to weave past them, on uneven ground around the outside of the zoo. What would have worked well would be, staggered starts 4k runners, 8k runners, walkers, but I guess they were trying to save blasts of the airhorn and avoid someone talking to the crowd.
At the end of it all it was really cool to run around the zoo, past the gorilla enclosure was particularly rewarding, it got me wondering what it was like for them to see all the humans running past instead of stopping and staring.
My approach was to run all the way but I have to make comment about the dude taking photos. Clearly this guy was too tight to go to the zoo so instead he entered the race, got to the first animal stopped, took photos with his phone and then sprinted to the next animal and did the same. This was a pretty funny thing to see, and I hope for his sake he got some good pics.
Friday, January 28, 2011
A week (2x5k) off from running
I have been sick with a virus, and no its not a man cold like every female I know seems to tell me.
Anyway what this means is that I have not run since last Sunday. Its odd how things like not running can effect you mentally. I feel this constant pulling in the back of my mind to get my shoes on and go for a run, but the last time my energy levels felt like this was, when I slept for 3 days a week after the marathon when I attempted a 10k too early.
I probably could have run last night but I'm scared that I will end up sicker if I push it too early.
Another upside of not running is that my ankle is feeling better than it has in a long time, its no where near as stiff in the mornings and it has regained a lot of its flexibility.
So I will run tonight, 5k and hopefully this will help to clear some of the snot out of my system, and help remove some of the anxiety that I have accumulated over the week.
Anyway what this means is that I have not run since last Sunday. Its odd how things like not running can effect you mentally. I feel this constant pulling in the back of my mind to get my shoes on and go for a run, but the last time my energy levels felt like this was, when I slept for 3 days a week after the marathon when I attempted a 10k too early.
I probably could have run last night but I'm scared that I will end up sicker if I push it too early.
Another upside of not running is that my ankle is feeling better than it has in a long time, its no where near as stiff in the mornings and it has regained a lot of its flexibility.
So I will run tonight, 5k and hopefully this will help to clear some of the snot out of my system, and help remove some of the anxiety that I have accumulated over the week.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Did I fail
I got up this morning intending to run. It's been so long since I have gone on a long run I decided after a week on holidays with the kids it would be a perfect chance to clear my head.
I also decided to take up a very kind offer of a ride from Woori Yallock (in the Yarra valley) back to mt.Evelyn. Which makes for a beautiful 15k run along the Warburton trail, which is an old disused train line running from Lilydale to Warburton.
This one of my favorite places to run. Gravel path, lots of bush and some open spaces, and long graded hills.
15k from Mt.Evelyn to Woori and I decided I would tack on an extra 3k out and back to make it a nice half marathon.
I started running at 11:30am and the outside temp according to the suby was 23deg. All was going well, I think subconsciously I had decided today was the day to nail the sub 2 hour 1/2 as I was watching the clock and working hard to stay under 5:30min/k. This all went well for about 5k, at which point the temp rose by about 5deg.
At 6k I was struggling to keep running but I pushed on.
At 7k there is a cafe which was tempting me to stop for a sports drink. 8
At 8k I stopped at a tap and soaked my self and filled my bottle.
From 8-10k I ran in the sun and walked in the shade, I could feel myself roasting, and my HR was going nuts, I decided that today was not a PB run, then I decided it wasn't going to be a 1/2 either, I would run the 15k.
As I reached the 10k mark I was running between shady bits and long sunny bits. At this stage I decided that it was silly to go on this way, it was simply too hot (for me) to be running. So I called my ride and he picked me up from the 10.38k mark.
When I returned the outside temp at the car was 31deg. It had risen 8deg while I was running, and it's really no wonder I was roasting.
Today's run left me asking however, did I fail or was this a smart thing to do given the circumstances.
I think after much contemplation that it wasn't a failure but a tactical retreat :)
I also decided to take up a very kind offer of a ride from Woori Yallock (in the Yarra valley) back to mt.Evelyn. Which makes for a beautiful 15k run along the Warburton trail, which is an old disused train line running from Lilydale to Warburton.
This one of my favorite places to run. Gravel path, lots of bush and some open spaces, and long graded hills.
15k from Mt.Evelyn to Woori and I decided I would tack on an extra 3k out and back to make it a nice half marathon.
I started running at 11:30am and the outside temp according to the suby was 23deg. All was going well, I think subconsciously I had decided today was the day to nail the sub 2 hour 1/2 as I was watching the clock and working hard to stay under 5:30min/k. This all went well for about 5k, at which point the temp rose by about 5deg.
At 6k I was struggling to keep running but I pushed on.
At 7k there is a cafe which was tempting me to stop for a sports drink. 8
At 8k I stopped at a tap and soaked my self and filled my bottle.
From 8-10k I ran in the sun and walked in the shade, I could feel myself roasting, and my HR was going nuts, I decided that today was not a PB run, then I decided it wasn't going to be a 1/2 either, I would run the 15k.
As I reached the 10k mark I was running between shady bits and long sunny bits. At this stage I decided that it was silly to go on this way, it was simply too hot (for me) to be running. So I called my ride and he picked me up from the 10.38k mark.
When I returned the outside temp at the car was 31deg. It had risen 8deg while I was running, and it's really no wonder I was roasting.
Today's run left me asking however, did I fail or was this a smart thing to do given the circumstances.
I think after much contemplation that it wasn't a failure but a tactical retreat :)
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
All years resolutions
After the past 18 months becoming a runner, dropping 20kg and basically turning my whole life upside down, I have decided that I don't get why anyone would wait unti new years to make a resolution. I wonder If anyone has studied the ratio of made resolutions vs broken/kept ones.
Anyway that aside I have a new goal which is to get my weight under 80kg. This would put me at a healthy weight according to a BMI index.
I also find it curious that BMI is so widely used. Personally I think it's a load of crap. It's a system that was developed over 100 years ago which plots height against weight to come up with (generally) 4 ranges. They are obese, overweight, healthy weight, underweight. I guess as a general rule of thumb this works.
My goal is a little different though, I don't really care what my BMI is, I just want for the first time in my adult life to be in the 70s for my weight.
The other oddity about this goal is that I started running because I was sick of trying to lose weight. Dieting and all that crap takes it's toll on you after a long time. The difference now is that I am healthy eating because it will ultimately help my running.
The other great motivator is the fact that around christmas my wife and I were looking at some old photos from Christmas last year, and some older ones.
I cannot believe the difference 20kgs makes to me. Even at this time last year when I had been running for about 6 months I was still big. My mental image of myself still sees the big belly I had. However after seeing these photos it's clear that my mental image has it's clock set about 2 years in the past.
I guess I notice the lack of bulk the most when I am doing active stuff. For example, riding my bike to the station doesn't make me sweat heaps anymore, when I play with the kids in the pool I can swim really fast, and I feel like I am swimming on top of the water not dragging through it. Also while on holidays I played golf, and the difference my weight loss made to my golf was huge (not in my score unfortunately) I was able to walk around 9 holes and not feel like I needed a sleep which is always a bonus :)
Seeing the old photos made me feel sick, that I had let myself go that far, that I had not made the right descisions earlier. But mostly it made me glad that my kids will have their daddy as they grow up, because I have made the right descisions now.
So I guesss what I'm trying to say is, don't wait for new years to make resolutions. Resolve to make positive change when it's needed.
Anyway that aside I have a new goal which is to get my weight under 80kg. This would put me at a healthy weight according to a BMI index.
I also find it curious that BMI is so widely used. Personally I think it's a load of crap. It's a system that was developed over 100 years ago which plots height against weight to come up with (generally) 4 ranges. They are obese, overweight, healthy weight, underweight. I guess as a general rule of thumb this works.
My goal is a little different though, I don't really care what my BMI is, I just want for the first time in my adult life to be in the 70s for my weight.
The other oddity about this goal is that I started running because I was sick of trying to lose weight. Dieting and all that crap takes it's toll on you after a long time. The difference now is that I am healthy eating because it will ultimately help my running.
The other great motivator is the fact that around christmas my wife and I were looking at some old photos from Christmas last year, and some older ones.
I cannot believe the difference 20kgs makes to me. Even at this time last year when I had been running for about 6 months I was still big. My mental image of myself still sees the big belly I had. However after seeing these photos it's clear that my mental image has it's clock set about 2 years in the past.
I guess I notice the lack of bulk the most when I am doing active stuff. For example, riding my bike to the station doesn't make me sweat heaps anymore, when I play with the kids in the pool I can swim really fast, and I feel like I am swimming on top of the water not dragging through it. Also while on holidays I played golf, and the difference my weight loss made to my golf was huge (not in my score unfortunately) I was able to walk around 9 holes and not feel like I needed a sleep which is always a bonus :)
Seeing the old photos made me feel sick, that I had let myself go that far, that I had not made the right descisions earlier. But mostly it made me glad that my kids will have their daddy as they grow up, because I have made the right descisions now.
So I guesss what I'm trying to say is, don't wait for new years to make resolutions. Resolve to make positive change when it's needed.
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